Let’s be real—being the only single person in your friend group can feel downright isolating. You love your friends, you love their relationships, but sometimes it feels like you’re standing on the outside, looking in. While they’re posting cute couple pics or talking about their partner’s quirks, you’re over here scrolling dating apps or figuring out what show to binge next.
It can be tough. And lonely. And sometimes, it’s easy to feel like you’re just not in on what everyone else seems to have figured out. But here’s the good news—you’re not alone in feeling this way, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being single, even if it feels like you’re the last one standing.
So, let’s talk about how to deal with that loneliness, how to embrace your single life, and how to feel connected with your friends, even when it feels like you’re on different paths.
Why Being the Only Single Friend Feels So Isolating
First, let’s break down why being the only single person can feel so isolating, even when you’ve got a great group of friends.
1. The Third-Wheel Effect
We’ve all been there. You’re out with your couple friends, and suddenly you’re the third wheel, or worse—the fifth wheel. It can feel like there’s an invisible barrier between you and your coupled-up friends, especially when they start talking about couple things—shared weekends, relationship issues, or date night plans. You love them, but you can’t exactly relate. And that disconnect can make you feel like an outsider in your own circle.
2. Feeling Left Out of Couple-Centric Activities
It’s not that your friends mean to exclude you, but sometimes they’re going to do couple-centric things. Group vacations, double dates, cozy nights in—all of these can leave you feeling a little out of place, especially when the activities seem tailored for pairs.
It can sting when your friends don’t realize that some events just don’t fit your current lifestyle. And when you do attend, it might feel awkward, like you’re playing a role you didn’t sign up for.
3. The Relationship Talk
Ever been at brunch with your friends, and the conversation always turns to relationship stuff? Their partner’s habits, their future plans, their cute fights over what to watch on Netflix. Meanwhile, you’re sitting there with your mimosa, thinking, “I can’t contribute to this.”
It’s not that you don’t care—you do! You love hearing about your friends’ lives. But it can be draining when the conversation rarely touches on your single experience.
4. Society’s Pressure to Be Coupled Up
Let’s be real—there’s a lot of pressure from society to be in a relationship. It’s everywhere you look. Social media, movies, even those well-meaning comments from family members asking, “So, are you seeing anyone?”
When all your friends are in relationships and you’re not, it can amplify that societal pressure and make you feel like you’re somehow “behind” or missing out. But guess what? You’re not. Everyone’s timeline is different, and your worth isn’t tied to your relationship status.
How to Cope with the Loneliness of Being the Only Single Friend
Now that we’ve acknowledged why being the single friend can feel isolating, let’s talk about how to cope with it in a way that keeps you feeling empowered, connected, and hopeful.
1. Embrace Your Single Life
I know it sounds cliché, but truly, this is your time to embrace being single. It’s easy to feel like your life is on pause until you’re in a relationship, but that’s far from the truth. Being single is an opportunity to focus on yourself—your passions, your growth, your happiness.
Do the things that light you up. Travel solo. Pick up hobbies that you’ve always wanted to try. Dive deep into your career, or take up a passion project. This is your time, and it’s just as valid and exciting as any relationship.
2. Find Connection Outside of Your Friends’ Relationships
If your friend group is mostly couples, it might be time to expand your social circle. Look for other single friends, join a group with shared interests, or connect with people who are in the same phase of life as you. Sometimes, all it takes is finding someone who understands what you’re going through to make you feel less alone.
Having a mix of coupled and single friends helps balance out your social life and reminds you that there’s so much more to connect over than just relationships.
3. Communicate with Your Friends
Your friends probably don’t even realize how isolated you feel. They’re not intentionally leaving you out, but they may not understand how some of their couple activities or conversations make you feel. If it’s starting to wear on you, consider having an honest, open conversation with them.
You don’t need to make it a big, serious talk. Just let them know that sometimes it’s hard to relate, and it would mean a lot if they included you in conversations and plans that aren’t all about couples’ activities. A good friend will appreciate your honesty and make the effort to include you in a way that feels comfortable.
4. Stop Comparing Yourself to Your Friends’ Relationships
Comparison is the thief of joy, right? It’s easy to look at your friends’ relationships and feel like you’re missing out. But here’s the thing: you don’t see everything. Every relationship has its ups and downs, and no one’s life is as perfect as it might appear.
Focus on your own journey. Just because your friends are coupled up doesn’t mean they’ve got it all figured out. You’re on your own path, and it’s perfectly okay if it looks different from theirs.
5. Celebrate Your Friends, But Also Celebrate Yourself
Of course, you want to celebrate your friends and their milestones—engagements, weddings, anniversaries. But make sure you’re also celebrating your own wins, too. Whether it’s a career achievement, a personal goal you’ve hit, or just surviving a tough week—those things matter, too.
Your life is full of things worth celebrating, even if they don’t revolve around a relationship.
6. Stay Hopeful About Love
It’s easy to feel jaded when you’re the only single friend. It can make you wonder if love is ever going to happen for you. But here’s the truth: love isn’t on a timeline. Just because it hasn’t happened yet doesn’t mean it won’t. Keep your heart open, and remember that love has its way of showing up when you least expect it.
The best love stories often happen when you’re not actively searching or trying to force it. So, don’t stress. Keep living your life, and trust that the right relationship will come in its own time.
The Perks of Being Single (Yes, There Are Perks!)
Before we wrap up, let’s remind ourselves of the perks of being single. Sometimes, in the loneliness, it’s easy to forget that being single actually comes with some amazing benefits.
1. Freedom to Do What You Want
You don’t have to coordinate with anyone else’s schedule. You can travel, make spontaneous plans, and change your mind without worrying about someone else’s input.
2. More Time for Yourself
Relationships are wonderful, but they require time and energy. Being single gives you the space to focus entirely on yourself—whether that’s diving deep into your career, exploring new hobbies, or just relaxing without the emotional labor that comes with a relationship.
3. Personal Growth
This is your time to grow into the best version of yourself. Whether that’s working on emotional healing, leveling up in your career, or discovering new passions—being single gives you the space to become the person you want to be.
Final Thoughts: You’re Not Alone, and You’re Definitely Not Behind
Being the only single friend can feel lonely, but remember this—you’re not alone, and you’re definitely not “behind.” Everyone’s journey looks different, and just because your friends are in relationships doesn’t mean your single life is any less valid or important.
Keep doing you. Embrace your singlehood, and trust that love will come in its own time. But until then? Live your life to the fullest. You’ve got so much to offer, and your time will come. In the meantime, don’t let a little loneliness make you feel like you’re missing out—because your life is amazing, just as it is.